Day 41

Woke early and went down to the beach for a paddle and to have a look for the physical version of the stone from yesterday’s Shamanic Journeying. Didn’t find it but I think I now know where I need to go to get it. Feeling very happy and energised. Back in time for Chi Kung. Couldn’t understand why I was repeatedly falling over during the stand-on-one-foot bit, since I did it perfectly easily yesterday – then I realised that today was the first time I have tried it with my eyes closed. Back in my room, I ran through that bit of the process with my eyes open, just to reassure myself, and had no problems staying upright. Clearly I balance largely with my eyes! Next up was Initiation, where Richard passes on chi from Master Mantak Chia. The process itself was nothing much – took about 6 minutes and was mildly disconcerting. In terms of result, I’m not sure what I was expecting – something between neutral and a mild positive buzz I guess. I was definitely not expecting the overwhelming, profound, formless sadness which arose immediately after the process and remained for most of the day. Iron state control is useful – but of course can’t be maintained during processes like The Inner Smile.

Managed to buy and deliver my ‘secret Santa’ gift without revealing my identity – not easy in a town this small.

Next up was Kundalini Meditation. We shook for 15 minutes, danced for 15 minutes (old friends will be pleased to hear that I largely resisted the temptation to channel the Caddyshack gopher!), sat for 15 minutes and lay on the floor for 15 minutes. I would have been inclined to attribute my underwhelming results (an intense tickling sensation as if ants were crawling over the sole of my right foot, and a lessening of the slight pain in my lower back) to my initial state, but none of the other participants were exactly reporting fireworks. Finished the day with a near-death experience (more fun than it sounds!). Lovely post-dinner relax-tivity (strolling and talking) with Maria Noone. We stopped on the way home for a coffee and decided to try ouzo (since we’re in Greece and all). We were rather shocked at the generosity of the measure:

Maria (eyeing the large tumbler of cloudy liquid): what do you suppose they mixed it with?

Me: more ouzo?

Day 40

New strenuous Chi Kung process (agony for the feet but I’m sure it’s worth it – and at least I didn’t fall over) followed by a trip to see the ruins at Phaistos – 37 degrees and no shade but a beautiful and interesting place. Back just in time for class to start at 11. For the first 20 minutes or so, I was just so hot I couldn’t think but got better after I sat in the path of the fan for a bit. Julia Kurusheva taught Shamanic Journeying. Very interesting experience, though I was a bit disappointed that my animals didn’t talk. Other people reported having had entire conversations with their animals and some even hugged them, but my fantail just flew and the bear looked stern and pointed at a stone for me to pick up. At lunchtime I went back to my room, set my alarm and thought I’d have a quick nap. I woke up late for class having slept through 15 minutes of loud doorbell noises (the alarm on my phone) and probably some vigorous knocking from the housekeeping staff, if the pile of towels and cleaning equipment outside the door is anything to go by. Intended to swim after class but, you guessed it, ended up having a nap instead! Nice Greek salad and cod with garlic sauce for dinner. Lovely after dinner walk and conversation with Janine, a fellow student.

Day 39

Woke around 4 a.m. but managed to get back to sleep eventually and didn’t finally drag myself out of bed until 0750 – leaving just enough time to brush my teeth and pull clothes on before level 2 Chi Kung at 8 a.m. Much more comfortable today – in spite of me unexpectedly falling into a rosemary bush at one point. Embarrassingly, this didn’t happen during one of the bits where one has to stand on one foot. Both feet were firmly planted on solid ground but for some reason that wasn’t enough to stop me slowly keeling over. Only real agony today was in the arches of my feet which cramped pretty much throughout the half hour practice. A nice swim before class started again at 11 a.m. Laughter yoga was fun and felt like a workout and Richard told the first part of Mantak Chia’s “my master teach me” story – always one of my favourites. Two very trippy processes (ascending states and the unanswerable question) proved a refresher on breathing in time with another person and the subtle art of supporting a less experienced practitioner from the client chair.

Nice bedtime conversation with Nick and the children. Nick put the phone on speaker at his end and Sherlock woofed in the background. Dash is very excited about going to Chessington with school tomorrow and Katie has apparently left a mystery box of gifts outside my bedroom door awaiting my return.

Day 38

Woke up at 05:20 and thought ‘woohoo – I’ll photograph the sunrise’, but it was still completely dark. Spent three quarters of an hour trying to get back to sleep before giving up and deciding on an early swim. The water was really warm and the beach was beautiful but the waves were much bigger / stronger than I was expecting (apparently it is usually completely calm) so I took an ultra-cautious approach, not least because the only other person on the beach was a young woman in a startlingly short frock and no discernible underwear, beached face-down on the sand, possibly in a raki-induced coma. I was wondering whether I needed to try to move her into the recovery position when, to my great relief, she stirred, stumbled to her feet and staggered off down the beach. And then there was just me.

I spent about an hour pottering about in the shallows then went back to the hotel and got ready for morning Chi Kung. The strenuous new exercise was pretty challenging. Afterwards I returned to my room intending to do something useful but instead did a process and immediately fell asleep, waking up just in time for a quick breakfast of bread and honey before the course proper started at 11. Did the new exercise again in the afternoon – more comfortable second time around but knees still making an alarming noise reminiscent of a TARDIS trying to dematerialise. By the end of the day’s activities, I had the definite feeling that there was a small tingling charge at the tips of my fingers, which caused interesting sensations if I ran my fingertips over the skin of my arm for example.

Usually on Richard Bolstad‘s courses I have half an eye on ‘could I run this training?’ but not in this case. The things Richard can do with a straight face (and loose-fitting clothing) are so far outside my comfort zone that you really can’t get there from here.

Nice walk and good after dinner conversation with Maria Noone.

Day 37

Lift Chi Up. Integration (in Crete). Task.

Arrived in Matala about 1a.m. and was ushered straight to my room by the taxi driver. Accommodation clean but very basic (no phone, no chair, very strange bed). Was initially pessimistic about chances of sleep on very hard bed but fortunately the 6 Step Reframe did the trick and I slept quite well. Very weird feeling to wake up in a new place with no feeling for where I was, having arrived in the dark, but Matala is beautiful and has a nice laid back vibe. Very good experience of Robert Dilt’s neurological levels. Some interesting students on the course, (mostly women – which is always good :-), especially a woman who teaches mediation to secondary school kids in NZ. There’s a guy from Adelaide – and trying to stop ‘one more boring Thursday night in Adelaide’ from running through my head has been like Karen Blixen trying not to think of the camel’s left knee.

Wildly expensive dinner at an overpriced local restaurant with amazing views.

Raki is disgusting! But if you had some lime scale build-up around the taps I suspect it might be just the thing to dissolve it.

Looking forward to learning some new Chi Kung tomorrow – though a kind of weird half-sitting thing Richard demonstrated today looked painful!

Day 36

Kids off to school, thoroughly cuddled since I won’t see them for a week. Lift Chi Up. Packing. Train. Airport. Bag Drop. Security – cabin luggage chosen for random swabbing to detect explosive residues but no groping. I hate non-underwired bras but they certainly make it easier to get through security. The engineering marvels (cunningly disguised as wisps of silk and lace) I get from Rigby and Peller set off the damn machines every time. Mind you R&P were lingerie suppliers by Royal appointment to HRH the Queen Mother, so that gives an idea of the scale of challenge they are prepared to take on!

Day 35

Lift Chi Up. Dentist. Hairdresser. Errands. The Events at the Young Vic Theatre, task.

Another fabulous sunny, hot, hot, hot day – never let it be said that the weather gods didn’t sort out fab weather for my career break! The Events was very clever, moving, gritty, sad. I could have wished for slightly better singing from the choir, but Nick felt that they were just authentically amateurish.

Day 34

Lift Chi Up.

A beautiful, sunny, incredibly hot day. Very glad I wasn’t in the office. When I watered the pungas, Sherlock ran back and forth under the hose like a kid under the sprinkler (though thankfully without the squealing).

I started the day tired, after being awake half the night dealing with my mystery bite situation, and the heat, and some sad news from NZ, further mitigated against productivity. As a result I have rather too many things to do tomorrow and some things that should have been done before I go to Crete will now be done on my return. Hey ho – from this babies won’t die (as Linda Bulger used to say).

Over the last few weeks I have begun to think of myself as an ex-civil servant. However my inability to tear myself away from radio 4’s coverage of the cabinet re-shuffle yesterday tells me that “civil servant in recovery” might be more accurate.

Sad anniversary

Today is the anniversary of my father’s death in 2008 – it is hard to believe it has been 6 years but it must be true because Katie was still a tiny wee thing. Earlier in 2008, I had assisted on Instructor Training in Auckland and Dad had come up to do the proud (if rather nervous) Grandad thing. It made life rather tough for my sister, who ended up looking after the vomiting baby AND the slightly frail elderly man but it was, I think, a very special time for all of us.

Day 33

Lift Chi Up. Task. Altered two pairs of silk trousers, mended one dressing gown and one silk kimono. Attached leather patches to the torn knees of two pairs of leggings and one pair of jeans. Attempted (unsuccessfully) to bleach the stains out of favourite white blouse. Played with Sherlock and did some watering. Small mountain of handwashing. Obtained what I hope is a reasonably complete list of invitees (to Katie’s party). Got several bits of tedious admin sorted.